If Your Partner Does These 7 "Common” Things, They May Be Hiding Something

Although you don't have to keep tabs on each other every second of the day, it's never a good sign if your partner is vague about where they have been or what they have been doing. "When someone answer vaguely or tangentially about their whereabouts, either in person, via text or phone, then there is a possibility they have something to hide," Barbara Winter Ph.D PA tells Bustle. If this is the case, your best bet is to confront them about it, in hopes they will be honest and upfront.

The opposite can be true as well — sharing too much detail may be a sign they are covering something up. "They [may] go into too much detail about where they were or who they were with when you ask an innocent question," says Ross. "If you ask, 'Where'd you go for dinner and who was there?' You may get a long explanation that seems fishy, because often the cover up is worse than the crime." Once again, if your instinct is telling you something is off, communication is key.

Someone who is hiding something will avoid spending time together, conversations about certain things, making decisions, making plans, etc. "You may notice it's hard to pin them down about time together or planning," says Ross. "If they can avoid time with you, they think they may be able to avoid the guilty feelings or the potential for something to slip out."

Someone with something to hide will likely be very protective of their phone. "They receive text messages at odd times and get defensive when asked about them, or they say they are from someone about something that doesn't make sense," says Ross. "You find yourself thinking, 'That's odd' and then dismissing it thinking, you must be imagining things. This is the classic telltale sign and coverup, and the phone is the primary method of communication."

"They have more reasons to stay late at work, more after work obligations, or more business-related trips than normal," says Ross. "This is the perfect way to try to hide something. When it happens in small doses, it seems reasonable and may not be questioned, but little by little you notice a pattern or something just doesn't sit right." It may be true that a recent promotion or change in situation with their career is causing your partner to be more involved at work, but if you have any reason to question this, ask your partner directly.

If your partner constantly puts the blame on you for any insecurities you may have, it's not a good sign. "Gaslighting — a particularly virulent process that causes the recipient of the information to question themselves and their reality — includes things like 'No, that never happened' or tangential nonsensical explanations to questions," says Winter. And it's important to be aware of it, because gaslighting, in some cases, can be a form of emotional abuse.

If your partner is hiding something, it may affect your sex life. "They start avoiding sex, or they make more of an effort to have sex — two sides of the same coin," says Ross. "If someone is hiding something, this can be a way to avoid intimacy with you or distract from suspicion."

If your partner is engaging in these suspicious habits, it may be time to have a serious conversation and find out whether or not they are being fully honest with you.